From Churban to Chibur: Reconnecting on Tisha B’Av

On Tisha B’Av we mourn the destruction of the Beit HaMikdash. We refer to it as the “Churban” – the Destruction. It is essential to understand what we lost, so that we can truly yearn for what we hope to rebuild. To gain a more profound understanding of the Churban, we will explore three Gemarot that offer three different reasons for the destruction of the Beit HaMikdash. 

The Gemara in Yoma 9b highlights that the first Beit HaMikdash was destroyed because the people violated the “big three” transgressions – idolatry, murder and promiscuous activity. The second Beit HaMikdash, which we are still mourning, was destroyed due to baseless hatred (sinat chinam).

However, the Gemara in Nedarim 81a takes a different approach, suggesting that the destruction of the Beit HaMikdash occurred because the people did not recite the birchat haTorah, the blessing before learning Torah. This is shocking. Is it possible that people were engaged in the study of Torah but due to a “technicality” of the lack of the recitation of a beracha preceding such learning, devastation and destruction ensued?

Lastly, Rav Yochanan states in Bava Metzia 30b that the Beit HaMikdash was destroyed because people did not act lifnim mishurat hadin – they only followed the strict letter of the law. They did not go beyond, didn’t give an inch, and didn’t show flexibility or compassion.

How do these three reasons – sinat chinam, lack of birchat haTorah, and not acting compassionately – fit together? Are these three unrelated flaws, or can we find a unified perspective on why these failures triggered the Churban?

Before we address these questions, there is one more Gemara that needs to be explored to complete the puzzle. In Sanhedrin 96b, the Gemara describes a voice from heaven, a bat kol, that was heard as Titus ignited the Beit HaMikdash, stating three declarations: “am ketila ketalt – You killed a dead nation”; “heichala klia klit – You burned a burned building”; and “kemach techina techint – You ground already ground flour.” What does this last phrase mean? What does “grinding flour that is already ground” add to the first two declarations? The first is directed at the nation and the second at the Beit HaMikdash. What is the purpose of the third example relating to ground flour, and how does it relate to the Churban?

In Hebrew, words that share letters – sometimes in reverse – can reveal deep connections. For instance, oneg (pleasure) and nega (affliction) share the same letters but have opposite meanings. Similarly, beracha (blessing) and bechor (firstborn) are connected ideas, particularly in the context of receiving a double portion.

Similarly, churban and chibur share the same letters. Churban is the opposite of chibur – disconnection versus connection. More importantly, not all destruction is the same. There are two types of churban: total annihilation – burning something until it turns into ashes and can never be reconstituted; and dismantling – taking something apart but leaving the pieces intact. The system is broken, but it’s not gone. It’s dismembered, not erased, and can be reassembled.

The Churban represents the second type. Though the Beit HaMikdash was destroyed, the Jewish nation was not obliterated. We were broken into pieces that can be reunited.

Here lies a powerful question: When do we start easing the mourning customs of Tisha B’Av? Halachically, it’s after midday on the 10th of Av. But experientially, we begin to feel the shift on Tisha B’Av afternoon itself. That’s when we start sitting on chairs and put on tefillin. Our minds begin to move toward returning to our daily lives. Yet ironically, according to the Gemara in Ta’anit 29a, that’s exactly when the Beit HaMikdash began to truly burn. Why do we feel relieved when the situation actually worsened?

Rav Yosef Dov Soloveitchik explains that up until that moment, it was unclear whether Hashem would punish the perpetrators or His beloved nation. Were we going to be destroyed, or would He destroy the temple as a mashkon – collateral – and allow the nation to exist? When the Mikdash began to burn, it became clear. Hashem chose the Mikdash as collateral. He sacrificed the building, not the nation. We were broken but not eliminated.

That’s when the comfort begins. The destruction of the Beit HaMikdash isn’t a rejection of us – it’s a declaration of the eternal connection that exists between Hashem and the Jewish nation. It represents the second type of churban: dismemberment, not annihilation; disconnection, not deletion.

Now we return to the ground flour. Titus thought he had won. But the bat kol mocked him: “You ground flour already ground.” What is flour? Ground wheat that has already been separated and fragmented. Titus thought he was destroying the Jewish nation, but in truth, the nation was already in a state of disconnection. But Titus didn’t realize that flour can also become dough. It has value and can be rebuilt. The Jewish people were in shambles but could and would be rebuilt.

So what did we become disconnected from? The Gemara in Bava Kama 30a provides a powerful framework. To become a chasid (a pious individual), one should focus on three areas: laws of damages (interpersonal integrity), Pirkei Avot (personal ethics), and Berachot (religious connection).

The Maharsha explains that these three characteristics correspond to the three dimensions of existence: between person and person, between person and oneself, and between person and G-d. These three dimensions mirror the three Gemarot that offer different factors leading to the Churban. The lack of blessing before learning Torah reflects our lost bond with Hashem – Torah was not cherished as a divine connection. Baseless hatred severed our connection with one another. Acting without compassion, strictly by the letter of the law, caused us to lose our sense of self.

The Churban didn’t merely destroy a building. It reflected and sealed our disconnection from everything meaningful: from G-d, from each other, and from ourselves.

Yet this understanding points toward redemption. We brought about the Churban and caused the disconnection. If we want it rebuilt, we must initiate the reconnection in all spheres. We must recite blessings before studying Torah, approaching it not merely as intellectual exercise but as divine connection. We must cultivate ahavat achim, rebuilding relationships and establishing mutual respect among all Jews. We must strengthen our values, living with humility and compassion, remembering from where we came and who we are.

As we experience the mourning on Tisha B’Av, may we be able to turn the Churban into a chibur, reconnecting to Hashem, to others, and to our true selves, so that we merit a complete redemption.

Rabbi Shalom Rosner serves as rabbi of Kehillat Nofei Hashemesh in Beit Shemesh, and as the Rosh Beit Midrash of Machon Lev English Speakers program. He is the author of the Shalom Rav series, including Parsha, Haggadah and a newly released Birkon.